Taking for Granted

Today it really hit me, part of this "lifestyle" of being a prison wife isn't not being able to share accomplishments. Small things like cleaning out and vacuuming my car (which is kind of a big deal to me since thats his department) to something big, well big to me. Growing up I have always been creative, always creating, thinking of anything and everything and when I was hired at newspaper over three years ago, my passion flourished. My passion soon turned from drawing to graphic arts and my words of melody soon became news worthy pieces and feature stories. I have always wanted to step out from the newspaper business, as a freelance writer, and after a few years my first magazine feature is in Idaho Magazine in the September issue. I was excited to open the mailbox to see the large envelope which encased my three complimentary copies, I soon ripped it open to browse the colorful pages to see my name, my picture, my photographs anything really. I went into my apartment and sat on the couch and it dawned on me, the one person I want to share my accomplishment with isn't here. I wish we could go have a celebratory drink, hell I wish I could just hear an,"that's good baby." Now I know that will come in a phone call and he will tell me all the sweet things and the "I'm proud of yous" but it would be so nice to just have it in person.

I guess it never really dawned on me that things like this are taken for granted in everyday life. Even things when Tom scores a 90 on a test in his trade class, or even something simple like a good cooked meal. The small things are really what count and I miss them.

I wish he was here just to read it and look at the photographs in person with me rather than me making photo copies and mailing them, allowing someone else to read them first and then him. I hate the process, I hate the distance but I love this man. I know one day soon the accomplishments will be grander and greater and they will sprout both he and I, and in return we will be able to share in these wonderful things in our life together. Right now I will copy the eight page spread send it in an envelope and I know he will appreciate it, say he loves it, but I am sure he wants to be home to celebrate these small moments just as much as I want him here.

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